How what happened when you were young is making perimenopause worse

Midlife can feel like a rollercoaster ride, filled with ups and downs that seem to come out of nowhere. One moment you may feel stable, and the next, you could be overwhelmed with unexpected emotions. This episode of A Centered Midlife explores why these emotional shifts occur during midlife and how they are often tied to significant life events.

  • Hormonal Changes: As women approach menopause, hormonal fluctuations can lead to increased emotional sensitivity. This change can make you feel irritable or overly emotional about situations that previously wouldn’t have affected you as much.
  • Life Transitions: Midlife often brings about significant changes such as career shifts, empty nesting, or the loss of loved ones. These transitions can trigger emotional responses that may feel overwhelming.

I remember a specific Monday when I received a call that changed my perception of a friendship. Despite it being a relatively new relationship, the conversation caught me off guard. I found myself crying—something I rarely do. It was a moment that highlighted how midlife changes can unexpectedly influence our emotional responses. This emotional reaction forced me to confront deeper issues from my past and understand why this friendship felt so significant to me.

Our past experiences can shape how we react in current relationships. This epsiode will explore how unresolved childhood trauma can resurface during midlife, particularly in friendships.

  • Understanding Your Triggers: Reflect on moments when you reacted more strongly than anticipated. Often, these reactions are rooted in past experiences, particularly from childhood.
  • Seeking Patterns: For instance, I realized my emotional breakdown was tied to my childhood experiences with an alcoholic family. I often felt like I needed to earn love and attention, which made me vulnerable during significant relationship changes.
  • Therapeutic Support: Engaging in therapy can provide a safe space to explore these emotions and their origins. I found that returning to therapy after my emotional breakdown was crucial for understanding myself better.
  • Self-Compassion Practices: Practicing self-compassion can help you approach your reactions with curiosity rather than self-judgment. This shift allows for deeper understanding and healing.

As we navigate the complexities of friendship during midlife, here are some actionable tips to help maintain healthy relationships.

  • Express Your Feelings: Don’t hesitate to share your feelings with friends. Open communication can often prevent misunderstandings and strengthen bonds.
  • Check in Regularly: Make it a habit to check in with your friends, especially during times of transition. This practice ensures that both parties feel valued and understood.
  • Prioritize Supportive Relationships: Surround yourself with friends who uplift you and respect your emotional needs.
  • Know Your Limits: Setting boundaries can protect your emotional well-being. If a friendship feels overwhelming, it’s okay to take a step back.
  • View Relationships as Dynamic: Understand that friendships can change over time. Embrace these changes as opportunities for growth rather than losses.
  • Invest in New Connections: Don’t shy away from forming new friendships, especially those that align with your current life phase and emotional needs.

Navigating friendships in midlife can be challenging, especially when unexpected emotional shifts occur. By understanding the underlying factors contributing to these changes, you can foster healthier relationships and maintain emotional balance. Remember, it’s okay to seek support and practice self-compassion as you navigate these complex dynamics.

Key Takeaways:

  • Emotional shifts during midlife are often tied to hormonal changes and life transitions.
  • Unresolved childhood trauma can affect how we react in friendships.
  • Open communication and setting boundaries are essential for maintaining healthy relationships.

Emotional changes in midlife can be caused by hormonal fluctuations, significant life transitions, and unresolved past trauma that surfaces during this time.

Engaging in open communication, seeking therapy, and practicing self-compassion can help manage emotions during friendship transitions.

Yes, many people experience heightened emotions and challenges in friendships during midlife due to various life changes and emotional shifts.

Resources:

Resources & Links to Connect with Dr. Natalie:

Website:⁠ ⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠

Facebook: ⁠⁠facebook.com/learntoloveyourstory⁠⁠⁠

Instagram:⁠⁠⁠ instagram.com/dr.nataliemarr⁠⁠⁠

Linked In: ⁠⁠⁠linkedin.com/in/natalie-m-marr-psy-d-lp-6a9298147⁠⁠⁠

Tik Tok:⁠ ⁠⁠tiktok.com/@doc.natalie⁠

⁠⁠DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://LearnToLoveYourStory.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠)⁠, ⁠(⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://NatalieMarrCounseling.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠),⁠ and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums. If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org⁠/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠

CALL 988

Crisis Text Line:

⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.crisistextline.org/⁠⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Text HOME to 741741

Episode 7: The Secret To Happiness Every Therapist Knows

This episode of Life Sucks, Now What?!? explores the concept of self-love as a solution to emotional wellness issues. It emphasizes the importance of building a relationship with oneself and practicing “separation with reparation” in our relationship with ourselves. Dr. Natalie discusses the neurobiology of relationships and the role of oxytocin in connection and love.

The conversation also touches on the impact of attachment theory and the need for compassionate self-awareness as we try to build a better relationship with ourselves. Dr. Natalie provides examples of how self-love can address issues like procrastination and encourages listeners to cultivate self-compassion and empathy for themselves.

Keywords: self-love, emotional wellness, relationships, separation, reparation, neurobiology, oxytocin, attachment theory, self-awareness, self-compassion, empathy, Dr. Natalie, Life Sucks Now What, podcast on mental health, mental health care, counseling, therapy

Takeaways

  • Self-love is a powerful tool for addressing emotional wellness issues.
  • Building a relationship with oneself and practicing separation and reparation can strengthen emotional well-being.
  • Oxytocin plays a crucial role in connection and love.
  • Attachment theory highlights the importance of early relationships in neurodevelopment.
  • Self-awareness and self-compassion are essential for cultivating self-love.
  • Self-love requires effort and ongoing practice.

DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠NatalieMarrCounseling.com and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums.

If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠

https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ ⁠⁠

CALL 988

Crisis Text Line: ⁠ ⁠

https://www.crisistextline.org/ ⁠⁠

Text HOME to 741741

Episode 4: Finding Motivation When Feeling Unmotivated

Ever thought to yourself “What is the trick to getting motivated when I am not motivated?” Or wondered how to start to introduce forms of self-care that gets you in that motivated mindset when you are feeling totally depleted? When feeling unmotivated, it can be challenging to start and follow through with tasks.

This episode of Life Sucks, Now What?!? explores strategies to get motivated and overcome demoralization, particularly in the context of job loss. The discussion focuses on the role of neurotransmitters like dopamine and serotonin in motivation and offers biohacks to boost these chemicals and get you started on the path to motivation again. The importance of engaging in creative activities aligned with one’s purpose and seeking social support is emphasized. It is also acknowledged that it is okay to grieve and acknowledge uncomfortable emotions while working towards moving forward.

Takeaways:

  • Anchor yourself to a motivating ‘why’ when feeling unmotivated
  • Engage in creative activities that align with your purpose to boost dopamine and serotonin
  • Seek social support and share your work with others
  • Acknowledge and process negative emotions while working towards moving forward

DISCLAIMER: The content in this podcast and video is not a replacement for therapy and is not clinical, medical, or mental health treatment. Dr. Natalie Marr is a Licensed Psychologist in the state of Minnesota. Her work with ⁠NatalieMarrCounseling.com and all affiliate social media entities is educational and coaching based ONLY. She IS NOT offering therapeutic services of any kind on these mediums.

If you or someone you know is having a mental health crisis or having thoughts of suicide, please use the following crisis resources (this is not an exhaustive list of available resources):

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: ⁠⁠

https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ ⁠⁠

CALL 988

Crisis Text Line: ⁠ ⁠

https://www.crisistextline.org/ ⁠⁠

Text HOME to 741741

Episode 2: Am I Attracting Negative People – Part 2

Watch the Podcast on YouTube
Listen on to the Podcast on Spotify

In this podcast episode, Dr. Natalie addresses the question of why some people feel stuck in relationships that do not serve them. She explains that there can be a dysregulation in the nervous system that keeps individuals trapped in these relationships. She emphasizes that it is not always a result of anxious or avoidant attachment or low self-worth.

Dr. Natalie discusses the impact of past traumatic experiences on relationships and highlights the importance of resiliency and available resources. She also explores how early life experiences shape our patterns of behavior and responses to conflict. Dr. Natalie suggests that therapy can help individuals rebuild neural networks and develop healthier relationship patterns.

Takeaways:

  • Feeling stuck in relationships that do not serve us can be a result of a dysregulation in the nervous system.
  • Traumatic experiences can impact our ability to form healthy relationships.
  • Resiliency and available resources play a crucial role in how we respond to traumatic events.
  • Early life experiences shape our patterns of behavior and responses to conflict.
  • Therapy can help individuals rebuild neural networks and develop healthier relationship patterns.

Episode 1: Do I Attract Negative People In My Life?

Watch the Podcast on YouTube
Listen to the Podcast on Spotify

In this debut episode, Dr. Natalie dives deep into the question: “Do I attract negative people?” Join her as she unpacks the psychological dynamics behind attracting negativity into our lives. With insightful analysis and practical wisdom, Dr. Natalie offers strategies for understanding and navigating these patterns.

Tune in to uncover the secrets to breaking free from negative cycles and cultivating a more positive mindset. She will explore strategies for overcoming this pattern. Discover the psychological mechanisms at play and learn actionable insights to break free from negative cycles. Join us for expert advice on navigating relationships and fostering a more positive mindset, with Dr. Natalie’s practical tips and transformative wisdom to elevate your life.